Even though I was born and raised in this religion, that was my own awakening as to why this was a way of life for me [and I decided to commit myself to this faith].”What does that mean to you and your faith? I had to go through a process of that, too, because you’re immediately recognised as a Muslim if you’ve got your hijab on. “For the personality type that I have, the hijab was very simple way for me to maintain a balance and a centre and a sort of discipline that I needed and that I don’t seem to find in a lot of other ways in this world. But the hijab is as simple as putting a T-shirt on.”“If you’re a conservative Muslim, your family gets you some men, you pick and choose what you want, and it’s done in a really quick turnaround period. And I don’t knock any sort of trajectory or pathway to finding love or getting married or having a marriage. It blows my mind to know that you can try this conservative approach, or this non-conservative approach…”But there’s no full-on “dating” that goes on in your community?
The free apps are a little more diverse, but people were less serious on those. So, I was on the apps, and I didn’t have any luck on them. “I will say that Muslim women, if they’re having sex, married or unmarried, tend to be really reserved about the conversations they have, compared to my non-Muslim friends, who tend to be very open and descriptive about the things that go on in their sex lives.”How does that topic even get broached in a relationships if both parties are aware of the fact that this is not something that should be done? The narrative, unfortunately, that gets spoken about is that women who are Muslim are, like, subservient or are not allowed to speak or are really beholden to their husbands in a negative way.
I would assume he’s already spoken to his parents about it.
Actually, he’s had to already have spoken to his parents. So his parents have given him the okay to move forward.
And then, maybe during the third or fourth conversation, it comes up.”I just have to tell them! They just don’t know the depths and the gravity of what that means and what they’d really commit to.
I am at this point in my life where I would love to build a family and settle down. And men who are like that, you’re just like, Oh yes. I’m 27 years old, and I feel like I’ve just calibrated my fuckboy meter. If they don’t advocate dating, then what happens if you meet someone? I do want to reiterate that ‘American dating’ is totally against Islamic standards.
Even in the most traditional Islamic way, there’s so much romance. The women are not sitting at home waiting for their husbands to come back.”I feel like that’s the perception a lot of people have about Muslim women.“That’s not the case at all.